A Trumpian Response to the 4 Questions

1. Why is tonight …
Because on all other nights, while Donald Trump is a selfish, undisciplined, shallow putz to Jews and gentiles alike, on this Passover, he directed his Trumpness to just the Jews. Who else can tweet Happy Passover without actually mentioning the Jewish people?

2. Why is tonight …
Because on all other nights, while Sean Spicer’s grasp of the facts makes one want to repeatedly smash a Seder Plate over one’s head, on this Passover, he deconstructed gassing people to death, took the sting out of Hitler, and equated Auschwitz with an Airbnb.

3. Why is tonight …
Because on all other nights, while most people who make bad Holocaust references resign and immediately transition to hosting their own shows on Fox, on this Passover, Sean Spicer, who inexplicably still has a job, doubled down on his.

4. Why is tonight …
Because on all other nights, while presidents of the United States are happy and honored to host and attend a White House Seder, on this Passover, Donald Trump hung wth the goyim.

His absence was surprising to people who thought he would attend because of his fraught history with Jewish people. Notably, his campaign received widespread endorsement from Nazi groups and anti-Semitic figures like David Duke and Richard Spencer. Trump eventually denounced their support, but that didn’t stop him from later using an anti-Semitic image in an tweet criticizing Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton.

5. Why is tonight …
Because on all other nights, while we try to choreograph the full extent of this administration’s anti-Semitism, on this Passover, we were reminded that Trump is positively Wagnerian in his coolness to the Jewish people.

State Department drafted statement specifically naming Jewish victims to mark Holocaust Remembrance Day, but Trump’s White House replaced it with the now controversial statement omitting Jews entirely .